Here’s the scenario: friend of mine meets a new love prospect and invites said person to their house. The love interest has now visited twice and the host has not shown them around (that is, hasn’t given them a tour of the house).
Forgetting Emily Post, what’s your opinion on showing your house off to new visitors? A must? Too intrusive? Only if it’s clean?
Further, what do you as a guest feel if you’re not shown around the first time you go to someone else’s house? What if you’re never given the tour?
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Interesting ponderance. While good manners would normally suggest giving a tour, it may be a little early in the "relationship". Afterall, this is a potential love interest. If they do not know each other well, your friend may feel uncomfortable with the intimacy this situation can create - a persons bedroom can be a very private thing and they may not be ready to share that yet. However, I would at least have given a showing of the common rooms and just left the bedroom doors shut if this were an issue. I think it is just common courtesy.
If the host is inviting the other person, a tour is going to be expected (if the house isn't clean, the host should think twice about inviting people over). Sure a bedroom is a personal space, but if said person feels funny about another person seeing it, s/he should shut the door (that's what I do at parties if I don't want someone looking into a certain room)... my take on it.
Any time a door is closed in my house it means it's dirty on the other side. We have friends coming this weekend, we'll be cleaning ALL of the rooms because they've never really seen our house. So yes, I think a tour is almost mandatory. As a guest, I'm forward enough to ask for a tour if they don't offer one.
I agree with all previously stated opinions. A tour can be suggested and one can see if that makes the guest(s) uncomfortable or not. I do agree with the shut door thing.
As a host, I would not invite a person over unless I was comfortable with them anyways so I would not see why they could not see my living room, kitchen, bedroom and even bathroom.
If there is one room exceptionally dirty, that's fine, keep the door closed but as a guest, I will always wonder what you're hiding behind that door!
Bottom line, all new guests deserve a tour. It's common courtesy and to me, not a bit intruding - new friend or old acquaintance. Just because I show you my bed from a doorway doesn't mean "I want to have sex with you". Hell, Jim and Karen were in my bedroom not even 2 weeks ago - doesn't mean I'm asking them for a 3some!
i'm nosey, i'll admit it. If i'm a guest in someone's house i want to see every nook and cranny they live in - closets, bathrooms, laundry rooms, unfinished basements, you name it. Part of it is because i like seeing how others live (as previously mentioned as my reasoning for being a passionate blogger) and the other part is that i really like interior decorating and seeing differant styles.
i also agree with megan, dirty or not a closed door will keep me wondering for hours...
as a host i'm very blessed that although i'm messy (not dirty mind you!) my husband is a neat FREAK and keeps the house so pretty i'm never embarressed to have even impromptu guests around.
I wish my husband was a clean freak......
I know one room I'd show her... ;)
Hey, he may have had a dame in the bedroom cooling her jets until the new love interest left. I'm not condoning, just saying...
Maybe he was just sparing the new love interest from an awkward moment. ("Hi, I'm Tammy." "Um, hey Tammy, I'm Joan...um, do you live here?" "What?! God No! I'm just here for the sex!")
The man's a gentleman, give him a break!
Now, there's a martini with my name on it somewhere in this world and I'm gonna find it!
Andy Martini
"Flame-proof and Limousine Ready"
I think further color commentary of Megan's closing statement would be fitting.
Mr. Martini's comments are hilarious. I'm going to go that route.
I'm a neat freak, too, but haven't had time to pick up lately. Do you rent Jim out? I'll cook good food!
No further comment.
I'd show my romantic interest my bedroom, course right now that's the living room....since my bed is right next to the front door, one day that will come in handy. I just know it!!!
How funny. I have asked about the renting out of Jim also. I'm sure he will come in handy when the little one comes along... Karen and Jim will come for a visit... Karen will baby hold and Jim will clean. :-)
The Tour is important, even if it's just a tiny shack. I think it helps make the place feel more cozy if you actually see everything - otherwise I would wonder what the person is hiding (filth, dead bodies, etc.).
Jim and i watched hussle and flow the other day. i told him was going to start pimping him out by popular demand for cleaning, hair brushing, complimenting, etc...
See me for a price and available work items. if he says he does things other than what's on my list don't believe him.
LMAO!!!
I think your next blog post should be the price list - then we can all print it out and keep it handy.
Come on, ladies! Let's not objectify Jim now. He's a person with feeling, not a robot maid!
:-p
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