Book Report, Chapter 8

William Lyon Phelps, essayist and professor of literature at Yale tells the following story:

“When I was eight years old and was spending a weekend visiting my Aunt Libby Linsley at her home in Stratford on the Housatonic,” he wrote in his essay on Human Nature, “a middle-aged man called one evening, and after a polite skirmish with my aunt, he devoted his attention to me. At that time, I happened to be excited about boats, and the visitor discussed the subject in a way that seemed to me particularly interesting. After he left, I spoke of him with enthusiasm. What a man! My aunt informed me he was a New York lawyer, and that he cared nothing whatever about boats- that he took not the slightest interest in the subject. ‘but why then did he talk all the time about boats?’ ‘Because he is a gentleman. He saw you were interested in boats, and he talked about the things he knew would interest and please you…” (p. 94-95).

And a business example:

Edward E. Harriman of Hagerstown, MD chose to live in the beautiful Cumberland Valley of Maryland after he completed his military service. Unfortunately, at that time there were few jobs available in the area. A little research uncovered the fact that a number of companies in the area were either owned or controlled by an unusual business maverick, R.J. Funkhouser, whose rise from poverty to riches intrigued Mr. Harriman. However, he was known for being inaccessible to job seekers. Mr. Harriman wrote:

“I interviewed with a number of people and found that his major interest was anchored in his drive for power and money. … When I told her [(his secretary)] I had a proposition for him which might translate itself into financial and political success for him, she became enthused. … After this conversation she arranged for me to meet Mr. Funkhouser.

I entered his huge and impressive office determined not to ask directly for a job. He was seated behind a large carved desk and thundered at me, ‘How about it, young man?’ I said, ‘Mr. Funkhouser, I believe I can make money for you.’ He immediately rose and invited me to sit in one of the large upholstered chairs. I eneumerated my ideas and the qualifications I had to realize these ideas, as well as how they would contribute to his personal success and that of his businesses.

R.J., as he became known to me, hired me at once and for over twenty years I have grown in his enterprises and we both have prospered.” (p. 98).

The point is – Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.