Though I did not mention it before, the book is divided into 3 main sections: The Six Ways to Make People Like You; The Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking; and The Nine Ways to Change People Without Arousing Resentment. For your own reference, this summary is the third chapter in section 2. Yes, that means we have a long way to go yet… (would be faster if I wasn’t reading Wicked and People at the same time!).
Let me start with a story taken from page 77:
What was the reason for Andrew Carnegie’s success? He was called the Steel King; yet he himself knew little about the manufacture of steel. He had hundreds of people working for him who knew far more about steel than he did.
But he knew how to handle people and that is what made him rich. Early in life, he showed a flair for organization, a genius for leadership. By the time he was 10, he too discovered the astounding importance people place on their own name. And he used that discovery to win cooperation. To illustrate: When he was a boy back in Scotland, he got a hold of a rabbit, a mother rabbit. Presto! He soon had a whole nest of little rabbits- and nothing to feed them. But he had a brilliant idea. He told the boys and girls in the neighborhood that if they would go out and pull enough clover and dandelions to feed the rabbits he would name the bunnies in their honor.
The pan worked like magic, and Carnegie never forgot it.
It is important and a sign of respect to remember the name of the people you meet. Especially because so many people forget the name of the acquaintance they just met by the time the leave the introduction. Therefore, take the time to remember the names of the people you meet. If you are bad with names, go so far as to keep a journal of those you’ve met so that if you find yourself invited to a place they may be again you can prepare before you go. Remembering names will always help you and will never hurt you in any and every situation.
A final example, Jim and his manager Aaron went to lunch in the cafeteria each afternoon after working out. Being men of routine (Jim? Noooo!), they frequently went to the same counter to get their food. Jim would ask for his item and the worker would give him the appropriate amount and hand it to him with a quick “thank you”. Aaron, on the other hand, made a point to remember the woman’s name and greeted her with a smile (see previous chapter) and a “What’s going on, Beatrice?” It was no mistake that Aaron’s sandwich had quite a bit more meat than my husband’s.
A person's name is the most beautiful word in the world to them.
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3 comments:
Names are very, very important. I think it's also important to use it in conjunction with a casual interest in the person, like what Aaron does with the cafeteria worker. It's the innocent yet interested question about the person, using their name, that really makes them at ease.
I'm glad to see that you are reading! Now read faster so you can get some books from me and try something really different!
=)
I can honestly say that remembering a name has helped me in many situations. It does lead to popularity and people's sppreciation!!!
The elevator guys in my building always treat those who address them by name a lot better than others. Most people don't actually say 'please' or 'thank you' to the elevator guys, either, which I think is rude.
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